Don't Be Jealous

 

We have the most schizophrenic "Hardware" store ever. I know that hardware stores really do have everything. Our beloved ACO in Michigan had jewlery and pie and ties. It was always a good time to check out what craziness was in the store. But seriously, this one takes the cake.

Right as you enter the store you see the women's clothing. Not just baggy, cheap jeans and t-shirts but a huge section of "trying to be stylish" clothing. They even have dressing rooms! Not just a janky back storage closet to clumsily try things on, but full fledged changing rooms!
 

Now let's be real here, some of the clothes were surprisingly cute, but come on? Really? I couldn't help myself and picked out a bunch of cute things to try. I was not hopeful. Turns out I shouldn't have been. Hardware store clothing, no matter what it looks like, fits exactly how you would expect hardware store clothing to fit.

After the awesomely awful clothing section you come to the camping section. Not just some sleeping bags thrown in the corner with some lanterns, but a pretty decent section.

Even some rock climbing equipment!

Hello!!!

Next to the live bait is a giant cooler filled with sardines and.... blegh, I don't remember what else. It was a giant freezer full of dead little fishies. 

 Ok, so if you made it this far (lol) you may be thinking, "ok, the juniors section was funny but the rest isn't so surprising". How about a craft store thrown into the mix? No lie. You go up 4 stairs from the gun and dead animal wall and you enter the craft section. Come On!!!

And not just any general crafts but a huge fabric section!

Of course general crafty things too. They've got a whole back wall full of yarn. More than our JoAnne's or Michael's does!

What's a hardware store without a cake decorating section?

Last but not least, the toy section. Yup. You can literally get EVERYTHING you need here, at one store, the Hardware store! Of course there's the normal stuff, actual hardware store things, a garden center, groceries and then on your way out....

Yup, a Post Office. I forgot to snap a picture on the way out :(  Picture an old school janky post office that's located in an old barn. It's falling apart, and is SUPER ghetto. It's awesome. It's always fantastic to find new crazy places in a new and crazy town!

Pure Michigan vs. St. George A to Zion

 Let me just start by stating the the Pure Michigan commercials are freakin' pure genius. Tourism offices at every state should be bribing whoever put that lovely little marketing piece together to come and do one for them. That or Michigan in the summertime just plain rocks. It might be the later. That commercial plays A LOT out here and every time I think, why did we move to a stupid desert? This is dumb! Why are we not lounging on the beach at Lake Michigan or playing at Sleeping Bear Dunes?

In contrast we have this janky St. George tourism commercial that makes me ashamed to live here. These two older people meet and are trying to seduce/show up/date each other or something. They go golfing and the lady is all "I was thinking we could do something more vigorous?" and the weird buff older man is all "can you handle it?". Uncomfortable. Seriously Uncomfortable. As Chad says, that's how you get the HIV. Then you see them biking, hiking, rock climbing, ziplining and doing all the really cool things that there are to do here but the whole thing has been ruined. It ends with them running through the dessert as fire balls fall out of the sky "chasing" them. I kid you not, I couldn't make this stuff up. 

So then I'm feeling all sad about my hot, dry, dessert life (with flying fireballs!?) when I could be back home in the lush, green, gorgeous, lake filled, forest swept Michigan! But then my brain says, "hang on, remember this?"

The snow is literally half way up his thighs in spots.

Winning.